Monday, November 6, 2006

And now for a momentary sports update:

The Browns actually played well enough to lose yesterday. Way to go guys! That's a big improvement from the norm, when the Browns play well enough to be called cheerleaders.

The Cavs go to San Antonio and beat the Fighting Duncans and then proceed to go to Charlotte and lose. That doesn't make sense. Why would Chewbacca live on Endor? If that doesn't make any sense, which I'm fairly certain is the case, feel free to check out the footnote below.

Guillermo Mota was banished for 50 games for steroids. My only question is this... why did he wait so long? It would appear that he waited until he was traded to New York before he started using them. He was certainly awful enough with the Indians. Sure could've used them then. What's the deal?

Purdue won a game that I was fairly certain they would lose. It's encouraging and discouraging at the same time. If they can pull out these last 3 games, they'll likely go to a good bowl game and get demolished. Taking each game individually, I think they're all winnable. I don't expect them to win them all, but they could. If that happened, they would be the worst 9 win team in history. It would be like watching Notre Dame in a BCS game.


Footnote:
Chewbacca Defense


Johnnie Cochran:
Ladies and gentlemen of this supposed jury, Chef's attorney would certainly want you to believe that his client wrote "Stinky Britches" ten years ago. And they make a good case. Hell, I almost felt pity myself! But, ladies and gentlemen of this supposed jury, I have one final thing I want you to consider. Ladies and gentlemen, this is Chewbacca. Chewbacca is a Wookiee from the planet Kashyyyk. But Chewbacca lives on the planet Endor. Now think about it; that does not make sense!

Gerald Broflovski: Dammit!
Chef: What?
Gerald: He's using the Chewbacca Defense!
Cochran: Why would a Wookiee, an eight-foot tall Wookiee, want to live on Endor, with a bunch of two-foot tall Ewoks? That does not make sense! But more important, you have to ask yourself: What does this have to do with this case? Nothing. Ladies and gentlemen, it has nothing to do with this case! It does not make sense! Look at me. I'm a lawyer defending a major record company, and I'm talkin' about Chewbacca! Does that make sense? Ladies and gentlemen, I am not making any sense! None of this makes sense! And so you have to remember, when you're in that jury room deliberatin' and conjugatin' the Emancipation Proclamation, [approaches and softens] does it make sense? No! Ladies and gentlemen of this supposed jury, it does not make sense! If Chewbacca lives on Endor, you must acquit! The defense rests.

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