I'm in Florida.

It is hot.

So hot.

I'm going to take my clothes off.

Hopefully I have no problems on the airplane today. My flights have been known to not go so smoothly however.

"Uh yeah. This is your captain. We've been informed that we're missing a part that the mechanics say we need, so we're going to have to go back to the gate now." This happened in Detroit, as I was flying to Delaware.

Terrific. There's some information that I'd just rather not know.

Later on that same flight we flew right into a horrible thunderstorm. That's the only time I've ever actually gotten air sick. I was looking out the window and the wing I'm looking at got hit by lightning. The lights go out for a second. We drop about 1000 feet. Some lady is screaming in the back. We're circling around the airport for about 90 minutes. Eventually we're running low on gas, so we have to divert to another airport. As soon as we touch down, and 50% of the passengers demand to get off, even though their luggage is going on to the original location. A hour later, we're back in the air. We touch down finally and I go to the rental car agency. They've given away my car. What's the point of the reservation then? The important part is holding the reservation. Anyone can take the reseveration. All they had left was a Taurus station wagon. Hooray. I take that and drive to my hotel, which was about 45 minutes away. Guess what? They've given out my room, but this time all they have left is the presidential suite. I finally get in there about 2:00 AM and have to leave at 6:00 AM, so I didn't even get to enjoy the room.

I flew uneventfully back to Detroit and then caught a prop job back to Cleveland. It looked like its props were held on with tape. If you've seen the Indians plane in Major League, that's what it reminded me of.

Hopefully this trip is nothing like that.

Happy Birthday to me. Happy birthday to me.

As a present to myself, I am going to Florida on Friday.

I'll be visiting Islands of Adventure while I'm there. I definitely recommend a visit for everyone. It's great in the pictures, but they don't even come close to doing it justice. The theming there is incredible. It's easily the best theme park I've ever been to. It's also not too shabby as an amusement park.

The Incredible Hulk



Jurassic Park River Adventure



Dueling Dragons



Dudley Do-Right's Ripsaw Falls

I was watching "They will not win this game" play the "We will win this game" last night and replays of the blocked shot at the end don't do it justice. They will not win this game. Watching it in real time was more incredible than all the slow motion replays of it. They will not win this game. Prince came out of nowhere and ended up 10 rows deep in the crowd. They will not win this game. I was shocked. They will not win this game. Miller should've dunked it obviously, but I don't even know if he can jump that high anymore.

So how do you feel Rasheed? They will not win this game.

How's your foot doing? They will not win this game.

What's your name? They will not win this game.

I'm sleeping with your wife. They will not win this game.

I've been grilling like a fiend lately... in between dodging the 3 daily thunderstorms we've had for the past week. Burgers, sausages, steaks, you name it. Meat and pudding may not be the healthiest diet on the planet however.

UNBELIEVEABLE! I just witnessed what could be the most impressibe weather display I've ever seen in person. I was looking out the window and it was perfectly clear. Within 1 minute (no exaggeration) the ENTIRE sky turned black and rain, hail, and lightning was everywhere. The clouds were moving extrememly fast. I checked the weather channel and couldn't believe what I saw. Looking at the radar, there was a line of huge thunderstorms in a bow echo from Columbus, through Cleveland, and over to Detroit. The storms were moving at 65 MPH over the area. The local news had footage of the storms crashing over downtown like a freaking wave. Heavy heavy fog was forming instantly at the front the storms along the ground, and as the camera was shooting there were downtown buildings that were engulfed in it like a freaking wave. I can't believe what I just saw.

There's a web page out there called Gmail Swap where people offer things (like a used iPod for example) in return for an invitation to join Gmail. Since I am apparently one of the few to have gotten Gmail, I'm not above selling out my invite. In fact, I have something brewing already.

I had a dream where I was in middle school or high school, and I asked my teacher how I did on the test, and their reply was "Don't go pouring that load of concrete into Dan Marino's jersey just yet."

Talk about things that make you go hmmmm. Does that mean I passed? What exactly DOES that mean?

The T-Wolves tried their best to blow it, but the Kings just didn't want to win it apparently. That had to be one of the biggest choke jobs I've ever seen. Minnesota was up 15 with 6 minutes left. Five missed shots and two turnovers later, they were up by 1.

Blah.

I had to scan through my Major League DVD tonight to get some screenshots of Rick Vaughn's jersey because I am getting mine personalized with the number 99 on it and VAUGHN.

"The Indians win it, the Indians win it, oh my God the Indians win it!"

My favorite part at that point is the guy in the background screaming "I can't beeeeeliiiiiieeeeeeeeve it!" because that's exactly what I'd be doing if they ever managed to win the World Series.

My Dell DJ 20 shipped today. Hooray for me. The only problem now is that I have to re-rip all my CD's and encode them at 256 bit instead of the 128 I ripped them in years ago. It's also not compatible with iTunes, so I have to re-encode those AAC songs I bought on iTunes into MP3's. It's not normally a good idea to encode from one lossy format into another though.

Twas a busy day and night for me. I watched the Indians beat the D-Rays 10-0 in the afternoon, and got burnt to a lobster crisp. Then tonight I saw Troy. I'd give it a solid 7. Would ask for it as a gift because I might want to watch it again some day. It didn't seem like a 2 hour and 42 minute movie. It moved with a pretty good pace the whole time. The acting by some (Orlando Bloom) wasn't anything to write home about, but it was interesting enough and certainly filled with action. It seems the epic battles put it in the vein of Gladiator, Braveheart, and Lord of the Rings, but I don't think the battles were as good as those in Braveheart of Lord of the Rings.

And last of all, don't forget about Diane Kruger (she played Helen). She is a potential top 10 nominee. She bears striking resemblence to a girl I work with, which is a big plus (and maybe is what leads to the nomination.) I can't really find a good still photo of her, but trust me when I say she looks better in motion anyway. This is the best one I suppose, but it's a bit small.

On the same day that Israelis held the largest peace demonstration in over 10 years in Israel, Palenstinians were marking the anniversary of "the catastrophe." What's that you ask? The Palestinians call the creation of Israel after WWII "the catastrophe."

If that doesn't speak volumes about what's happening over there, I have no idea what will. I just don't understand why everyone is putting so much pressure on Israel to give up land to the Palestinians (people who don't even acknowledge Israel's right to exist.) Appeasement NEVER works. If you give suicide bombers what they want - a Palestinian state - then they will get the message that blowing up Israelis eventually will get us what we want.

There's no easy solution over there, except for the Palestinians to realize that for every action there is a reaction. They seem to believe that Israeli helicopters and tanks are storming their neighborhoods for no reason, like that bomber they sent to an Israeli market had nothing to do with it.

Roy Jones Jr. lost last night. He was knocked down in the 2nd round, and the referee called it after he was on very shaky legs after he got up.

I can't believe it.

I have to admit... TiVo knows me pretty well. It recorded a show on the History channel called "Breaking Vegas: The true story of the MIT blackjack team" and it was actually interesting. I have to say, probably 90% of the stuff that the TiVo records for me automatically (without my input), I end up liking. It keeps recording old baseball and football games though. I don't really care to watch a World Series game from 1975 or the 1992 Citrus Bowl. If TiVo had a "I like this, but don't ever record it" button, I think it would be just about perfect.

Freaking Lakers.

There has got to be some conspiracy out there that causes the Lakers to win these last .4 second games. What else explains that shot? Fisher could shoot that fall away 1000 times and he might hit it once. I think the Ball had some clear wire that guided it to the basket. It has to be.

Freaking Lakers.

Sarbanes-Oxley = poo poo.

Leave it to Congress to over react to a singular event.

Step 1: Enron screws investors

Step 2: Congress screws EVERY public company by making them conform to idiotic standards and thereby making my daily work completely suck

Step 3: Auditors make BILLIONS because of this stupid piece of crap law

Two things: The Angels - Yankees game had better make it through 5. Glaus has a HR and 2 RBI, but it's raining in 4.

Next, I really like the new crew for Baseball Tonight. John Kruk is infinitely better than idiot Bobby Valentine. He isn't exactly the most insightful, but Kruk says what everyone else is thinking and doesn't say. I also like the way that Gammons is like Kruks teacher and has that reprimanding look and tone all the time. I think the banter is great.

Todays page is brought to you by the ever hilarious Ignignokt and Err (and a preview of SpaceCatraz.)

1. Volkwagen GTI VR6 (4 for 4)
2. Nissan Maxima SE (3 for 4, not in price range)
3. Ford Contour SVT (4 for 4, reliability concerns)
4. Honda Prelude (2 for 4, no V6, no leather)
5. Honda Civic Si (2 for 4, no V6, no leather)


That is the rank, following the necessary specifications (manual, V6, leather, price). If I find out that a Honda Civic Si has been purchased, an enforcer will be sent.

I'm watching the Indians - Orioles game on Sunday. Mike Hegan (former major league cather, and now announcer for the Indians) makes the comment "Omar offers at the off-speed pitch." It really didn't look like an off-speed pitch to me, so I looked at the pitch speed in the upper right hand corner of the screen. It read 98 MPH. That's one heck of an off-speed pitch. Jorge Julio's fastball must be somewhere between 110-120 MPH.

Another case of some brilliant Californians... There are what scientists call a swarm of sharks just off the coast of some city in California. So what do the residents do? They all get in kayaks and go out to look at the swarm.

Great.

Like someone once said... I am the smartest man in America.

Even though MLB will remove the logos from the bases, I don't think they have totally killed the deal. Maybe every stadium will be covered in spider silk for that weekend or you get a free super-power inducing spider with every ticket purchase or something like that. It is somewhat encouraging that MLB was trying to think outside of the box, but they picked a stupid way to do it.

If they really want to try something great, how about making people pitch to Barry Bonds so my teams OPS doesn't keep dropping.

So MLB has accepted a proposal from Sony to put Spider-Man 2 ads on all the bases the weekend that the movie opens... I don't buy. All that has happened here is that Sony completely duped MLB into millions and millions of dollars of free advertising. By accepting this, news agencies (like ESPN) are now running the story. It won't be long before national news coverage gives the story 5 minute chunks of time around the country, and possibly the world. What does this mean? It means there will be a huge backlash among fans and MLB will end up cancelling the agreement. What does Sony lose when this happens? Nothing. They just managed to pay nothing for tons and tons of free airtime. Every sports fan is going to be talking about this plan now, and in the end, when the ads get cancelled, it will have cost Sony zip.

I had a dream last night. Not weirder than any other dream I've had. I just happened to write this one down.


Places in the dream
Cleveland
Pittsburgh
Chicago
Ft. Worth
Dallas
Holden House in Pennsylvania (which by the way doesn't exist)

People in the dream
Jay Leno - cutting up onions (because he is my cook?)
Hugh Hefner - Driving Fred Sanford's truck
Pamela Anderson - passenger in Fred Sanford's truck
Richard Prior - I either am Richard Prior or look like Richard Prior. He is being chased by the cops or looked for by the cops at the Dallas airport
Alvin and the Chipmunks - I ate breakfast with them at a Waffle House


And now.... the dream
I was supposed to fly to Ft. Worth to meet my brother, but apparently I just went to the airport and got on the very first plane I could find. My original ticket was from Cleveland to Ft. Worth, leaving at 2:58 PM and arriving in Ft. Worth at 1:58 PM. Instead I arrived in Pittsburgh with my mom and bought a house, the Holden House. It was huge, had about 50 rooms and I remember the door buzzer went through a subwoofer, because I couldn't hear the buzzer so I turned up the bass and then I could hear it. There were also a lot of doors to the outside that were literally right next to each other. When I went into the kitchen I could see Jay Leno outside the window cutting up onions, so I can only assume that he was either my cook or my gardener.

From there I magically ended up back on an airplane to Chicago. I remember the captain saying "2 hours down and 6 hours to go" just as I was waking up. That didn't sound right, so that's when I looked at my ticket. I asked the guy next to me what time it was and all he said was "it's 55 after." I informed him how that was not particularly helpful. The next thing I know I was taking back off in Chicago, but not from the airport. The plane was getting onto the highway and going around a pretty sharp right turn. The pilot just lifted off and banked to the right. There were some really big power lines over there, like 500 feet tall. I was wondering if we were going to fly into them, but the pilot just kept banking and turning to the right. Eventually we were upside down - in a regular passenger jet. My ex girlfriend apparently walked onto the plane as we were in the air and sat down in the back. At this point it looked more like a flying bus than an airplane. I didn't want to talk to her so I turned around and pretended I didn't see her.

We land in Dallas and my mom is there again. We go out to breakfast at Waffle House and sit with Alvin and the Chipmunks. Meatwad might also be there but I'm not sure. From there we go to what I think is my house, the Holden House in Pennsylvania, except we're still in Dallas. Hugh Hefner and Pamela Anderson drive up in Fred Sanford's truck. It's really front loaded, so they park and go into the house. I start to unload it, but all I grab is a sleeping bag, a chair, and some cardboard tube box. My mom takes the sleeping bag and says something about how heavy it is. After that I tell her that I have to go to the airport because I'm late for my flight, so she drives me there in some blue van. Once we get there, I realize that it's not safe because the cops are there looking for Richard Prior. I get a scared feeling, but I'm not sure if it's because I am Richard Prior or if I just look like him, but I decide that I can't risk flying to Ft. Worth from Dallas because I feel like the cops are looking for me. Then I realize that it's only a 35 minute drive to Ft. Worth, and that's when I leave.

I was watching Pat Tillman's memorial service on ESPN tonight, and I thought one of the Navy Seals said something very insightful. He said "Pat Tillman, 1976 - 2004. That dash is a life. How do you spend your dash?"

I saw A Guy Thing tonight. It gets a solid rating of 5. Would watch if it was on TV or someone else rented it

There were some definite laughing out loud moments, but there were also a few slow points. It was better than I expected. It also had Selma Blair at her hottest going for it.